Introduce yourself to our readers.
Yo! My name is Nirvaan Desai and I have cancer. See? Says here on my t-shirt too.
God. That’s tough. I’m sorry.
Nirvaan: I’ll take all the sympathy you’ve got. Thanks. But let’s be clear, I hate wasting time on formalities. I want what I want and I want it now. So, let’s get on with this!
Right. As I told your wife, I’ll ask five random questions and you answer them as truthfully as you can.
Your wife mentioned a bucket list. What’s on yours?
Nirvaan: Going straight for the jugular. I like it! Simi has actually dubbed my bucket list the Titanic Wish List. I’ve checked most of the items off the list. I only have a few left, out of which #1 is getting Simi pregnant and #2 is making Zai acknowledge that he’s making a mistake with Marjaneh—his girlfriend.
Ok. Good luck with that. Would you stop eating junk food to live five years longer? Sorry, but this question card just popped right out of the pack.
Nirvaan: Told you, man. Don’t be sorry for me. And no, I won’t stop eating junk food as I know it won’t make a difference. Not that Simi or my mother allow me to eat junk. I’m on a very strict organic health food diet.
What three adjectives would your family use to describe you?
Nirvaan: Stubborn. Smexy. Stupendous.
What’s the best TV show ever?
Nirvaan: Does cable TV count? Then Game of Thrones. It’s awesome, man. And I knew they wouldn’t kill Jon Snow. Knew it!
Last question, and…shit, one of those ones again. Should I pull another question?
Nirvaan: Stop that. I told you, its all cool. Just ask it.
What’s the secret to staying young?
Nirvaan: Dying young. *drumroll*
Love your spirit. I wish you the best for the rest of your life. And that completes our little game.